today...

there was a young white woman standing on the corner looking about 5 months pregnant with a sign that read...
"Family in Need May God Bless You"

its raining and all she had was a scully cap and a sweater that barely covered her belly corduroys and sandals.

I handed her my loose bills. She smiled the brightest smile and said "God Bless You"

I wanted to open my door and let her in... get her out the rain... the light turned green and I left.

I rode all the way home in tears and the rain. With the harsh reality that I could easily be that woman on the corner. One of those things that make you even more thankful for what and who you have in life.

BOBBY

I effin LOVE this kid he's so extra-terrestrial.
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she took my temperature and then she took my heart

walked away with my medical chart

like "he's crazed"

possibly so, cuz these days break a man down

but how could we know?

i sat here, she sat there

chemicals flowed as i showed a catatonic stare

a fools gaze, heavy are the eyes

that look upon an ill kid, or maybe it's all fugaz

her prognosis, sick boy underlined

with five doses of love potion number nine

i sunk

and felt my heart beating

like oh happy dagger, when is it that we'll start bleeding

or stop

can't deny what i feel

to get well is to get gone, so why the hell heal


*sigh* he sooo DOPE.

Team TUCKER. he goesss mega hard.

Tucker Barkley originally comes from Texas, now lives in LA for the past year, to pursue his dance an choreography career. Even though Tucker is only 17 years old, he is no stranger to the dance world. Tucker has danced all his life, growing up in his mothers dance studio and competing.

Tucker has been told he is one of the most versatile dancers out there, from being technically trained in jazz, ballet, tap, and every style of hip hop, and even some breakin and gymnastics thrown in. But his passion is Hip Hop.

Since moving to LA the past year he has been working as a professional dancer, most recently worked with artists, Omarion, and Sean Paul with Keyshia Cole, and Disney�s Corbin Bleu, and Jordan Pruitt, Tucker is also working with several new artists.

THiS CHRiSTMAS.

Jordy.B and I put the christmas tree up on Happy Thanks, she delegated and I got my Martha Stewart on. Totally raided the parental unit. My mom has issues with buying stuff in bluk when its on clearance, she has like 6 xmas trees (we usually put three up in the house) hella bows, lights, ornaments, and tree toppers, xmas paper and bows. I just went in there and pick and chose what i wanted. Jordyn picked up the gold and white Angel and said " mommy shes sooo beautiful!" and she wouldnt put her down, so gold bows it was with white lights, simple and classy. Of course id choose the tree that rotates and spits snow out the top right, pist that i had to vacum up all that styraphome snow that came spewing out the top, UNPLUGGED IT REAL QUICK.


[rapping elf mic check one two one two.. lol]

Anyway, Jordyn and I had a conversation the other day about Christmas. I told her that she is a very fortunate child and that in order for her to recieve new things she most give away some of her old things to children who are less fortunate. She was totally all aboout it, telling me what she is going to give and to who. She decided all her little toys can go to her twin cousins because shes not a baby anymore, and she will give away some of her baby dolls to little girls who dont have any baby dolls... get this . lol "so i can make room for more baby dolls santa is gonna bring me." lol. Shes cute. This weekend her dads family took her to see the Polar Express at the IMAX theatre. She was soo excited to come home and tell me about the funny glasses she had to wear, and to blow that annoying polar express whistle they gave her. Running around here blowing and screaming "ALLLL ABOARD!!" She also got to sit on santas lap and tell him what she wanted for Christmas, im sure her list was super long winded, cause everytime a commercial for a toy comes on she talking about "mommy can you get me this for Christmas?" I got half my shopping done for her, just a few more things... im thinkin hard about the Furreal Pet Pony Butter Scotch. She wants it soo bad, but im like dude, the dora vanity is already in her room, shes getting this huge dollhouse, where am i gonna put this 3 foot tall pony? hmmmm.


[joeys home aloe face.]

Monday i took all the gifts out my trunk and wrapped them, HMMMPPPH i totally suck and wrapping presents, i hate it. THE ODD SHAPED BOXES UUGHH totally pissed me off. Then i got tape stuck to me, my boxes were wrapped all baggy like. lol haha im pretty creative person, but wrapping is not my fortae'. Gift bags and Gas Gift Cards on mine for the rest of the people. So, Jordyn came home from school totally WIGGIN out, "oh my gosh mommy santa claus is real, he came and brought me my presents oh my gosh!" She tried to open them, and got uber butt hurt when i told her she had to wait 22 more days. She cried and said "but mommy i dont wanna wait i been good." lol I went in her closet and found a babydoll and puzzle she hasnt opened yet, and let her play with those, she was happy, and we added two more things to the give away toy box.


[silly butt gigglin and showin off her freshly painted nails by mommy]

Im super sad my mom and my lilo sister are going to the West Indies to visit my grandparents. I couldnt swang 18 hunned each for me and Joey. Im totally gonna miss Carinval and boxing day. No patties, no ginger beer, no fruit cake, no jerk, no curry goat, no dum dum fruit, no shaved ice, no good dutchie, no Caribbean Rum, no torquise water, and white sand beaches, no soccer with mu cousins, no boxing day, no mash'n up the street to the early morning. *sigh* next year.

rage on JORDYN b.

she totally cracks mommy up, this is her white girl dance, better this than perculaten and cry babys like some people i know offspring. If you say princess' dont do something she wont do it, cause Jordyn B. is thee ultimate PRiNCESS and cant no one tell her nothing.



break dancing and raising the roof, whatchu know bout that! take it back joey!



just wanted to share some of the precious moments that melt my heart a million times over, im blessed.

lmaooooo

i will FOREVER BE DEADED a MILLION DEATHS everytime i watch this. i swear i do like 500 crunches from laughing sooo hard. DEEENNG. im convienced this is a chi chi man, cant no woman really look like this, if so im sad and i pray shes not from my island. BEWARE, you may fall out your chair. HIGH-LARRY-OUS.NESS.

Disturbed

" You and Jordyn dont act like Mother and Daughter, you act like sisters. She's going to be running you by the time shes five years old." - my mom.

That really hurt my feelings, I couldn't even respond to it, at all. I just stared at her with that " are you effin serious" look on my face. Last time I checked there was not a manual and class designed just for me and my child. Yes, books and classes in general, but not for JORDYN BROOKE ELIZABETH RENFROW!

Yes, she is SPOILED ROTTEN, she didnt get there by myself alone. Yes, she has a strong personality, she got it from myself and her dad. Yes, shes sassy in the mouth, hell shes my chld. Yes, shes hyper all the time, energizer bunny 24/7 she got that from her dad. Yes, shes rough and likes to wrestle and throws temper tantrums when she cant get her way, DUH SHES MY CHILD. Yes, shes UBER SMART AHEAD OF HER AGE! She got that from her father and I.

I really cannot be mad at the way she is because, she is a product of me. Although I can curb her attitude, shush that expressive tongue of hers, and calm her rage when shes passionate about something, BUT ALL OF THESE THINGS WILL MAKE HER STRONG. The world is tough, she will NOT BE BULLIED, SHE WILL NOT BE TALKED INTO DOING DRUGS AND THINGS SHE KNOWS ARE WRONG. Her stubborn ways are a pain in the ass now, but will be good for her when shes older. She never takes no for an answer, and if she does then shell take aother route to get what she wants. If that aint a go getter in training then i dont know what is.

All i can do, is my best. Teach her how to be an indepedent woman, put her trust in GOD, dont depend on NO GUY to help you get through life. I have to teach her to keep something to herself, not to give it all away, to the first boy who says he loves her. I got my work cut out for me, this i know. I got my shot gun and chastity belt on layaway too!

My mom says Jordyn is just like I was when I was her age... that I cant be mad about, at all. My child will be alright in this eff'd up world.